I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
