His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
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I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
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there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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