There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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