SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize
