He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
