I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Randomize
