I heard we made out
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Randomize