I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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