Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
