i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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