I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
