I want you more than these girls want KFC
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
