did you get engaged???
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
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