I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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