i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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