Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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