you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Come see our sink grown plant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Randomize