We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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