Soap is not a condiment
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
