i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
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