I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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