Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
