My Higher Power is John Stamos
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
where are you?
Hypothermia
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
