can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
