idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
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