it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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