Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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