i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
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