If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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