I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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