so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
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