What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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