The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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