Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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