so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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