I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
