is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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