Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize