Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
kristin has been a bad kristin
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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