That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
