Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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