think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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