I can't watch pbs sober anymore
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
