She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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