Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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