Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I cut my penus on the lid.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
