i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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