So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
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