now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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