Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.

  (817): View more from Texas

  I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house. (405): Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box. (817): I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift. http://tfl.nu/erp5
  Replies (103) Good night (1469) Bad night (2940)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral http://tfl.nu/k9rx
  Replies (31) Good night (4678) Bad night (708)
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow

  (1-269): View more from Michigan

  Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (269): So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow (1-269): Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10 http://tfl.nu/n472
  Replies (63) Good night (15369) Bad night (1119)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  "Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (601): "Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move http://tfl.nu/qn14
  Replies (10) Good night (1199) Bad night (3404)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (205): I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face. http://tfl.nu/ce47
  Replies (74) Good night (2481) Bad night (9113)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week http://tfl.nu/lvga
  Replies (9) Good night (2463) Bad night (1318)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened. http://tfl.nu/spf0
  Replies (4) Good night (3538) Bad night (915)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me. http://tfl.nu/x609
  Replies (5) Good night (2618) Bad night (874)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand. http://tfl.nu/8nd1
  Replies (7) Good night (1591) Bad night (982)
• Favorite

  (+79): View more from

  You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+79): You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win http://tfl.nu/jmv2
  Replies (4) Good night (1854) Bad night (537)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital http://tfl.nu/vfam
  Replies (4) Good night (784) Bad night (1516)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer. http://tfl.nu/iriu
  Replies (10) Good night (2471) Bad night (844)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle. http://tfl.nu/r2o0
  Replies (3) Good night (3278) Bad night (724)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (734): Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night? http://tfl.nu/9xzb
  Replies (1) Good night (653) Bad night (476)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid. http://tfl.nu/ckk0
  Replies (2) Good night (941) Bad night (290)

Randomize