I'm sorry my penis didn't work
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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